Your Rooster Sample Ballot
Columbus is ruled by a corrupt political machine, there are still candidates worth voting for and an issue to vote against.
It’s that famous time in America where we all go to a polling location and punch a ballot for candidates who don’t even know we exist. Democracy, baby!
This is a local election year in Ohio, which means roughly 15% of voters will decide issues from the local school board to judgeships and ballot issues financed by shady characters.
The corrupt Franklin County Democratic Party controls Columbus elections with an iron fist. The Republican Party doesn’t even waste their time with any races where their candidates will have the dreaded (R) to their name, though a local racist reporter named Tom Sussi is trying to buck his inevitable loss.
I won’t be voting for any city council candidate this year. Shannon Hardin, the city council president, has fixed the race in typical Columbus fashion.
Newcomer Nick Bankston is perhaps the most embarrassing candidate ever put forth by the machine, and they’re doing it because he’s long-time friends with Hardin, even going as far to officiate his wedding.
From Joe Motil of columbusfreepress.com:
Nick Bankston was Mayor Ginther’s former director of community affairs and resigned from the City early this year, and in January was, appointed as CEO & President of the Gladden Community House, a non-profit in the Franklinton area.
Bankston’s appointment to a non-profit fit right into City Council’s musical chairs playbook. Michelle Mills, Priscilla Tyson, Matt Habash and Andy Ginther all worked for non-profits before they were ushered into leadership.
Bankston’s appointment to the Gladden House was pre-arranged to help beef up his resume, enhance his public image and cushion his $58,000 part-time City Council salary once he is likely elected to City Council. And right on cue, his CEO position with the Gladden Community House is the very first thing announced when he was is introduced in Team Hardin’s political television adds.
Priscilla Tyson and Mitch Browns’ retirement announcements, after the fact their Declaration of Candidacy petitions were certified by the Board of Elections, was a premeditated ploy to avoid the decades of criticism which accuses City Council of selecting “one of their own” through City Council’s legal appointment process.
Nick Bankston never publicly expressed any genuine heartache over the fact he did not get enough signatures to get on the ballot knowing full well that his fate was secure with the announcement of Mitch Brown’s request on April 2, 2021, that his name not appear on the November 2, 2021 ballot. He only turned in just over 1,100 signatures, but only 727 were valid while needing 1,000 valid signatures.
The most infuriating part about this is the mayor worked to install Bankston as Gladden House CEO over Franklinton legend Trent Smith, who serves as the Executive Director of the Board of Trades. Smith knows every player in the neighborhood and has done work in the community for decades. Of course that meant nothing to the powers-to-be when they needed to pad Bankston’s resume.
Lourdes Barroso de Padilla seems fine if you visit her Instagram or whatever. But she, too, belongs to the machine and has obviously satisfied Ginther and Hardin to do her solemn duty of protecting real estate developers at the city’s levers of power.
My ballot will look like this:
City Council (write-in): Ho Chi Minh, Senator Meow and Xi Jinping.
City Attorney (write-in): Fidel Castro.
City Auditor (write-in): Lyudmila Pavlichenko.
Perhaps these candidates are not your cup of tea. That’s fine. Write in whoever you like! It doesn’t matter; Hardin, Bankston and Barroso de Padilla will win. Just don’t vote for Tom Sussi, who, once again, is a racist clown.
ISSUE #7: That’s a hard “no” from me, though I do admire the audacity of trying to scam a city the size of Columbus out of $84 million. I’m told by people who know that this issue could actually pass given the benign language at the ballot box, so this is reason enough to cast your vote to make sure 10% of the city’s budget doesn’t end up in the hands of grifters.
School Board is another big issue this year. Tough I haven’t heard of any insane right-wingers seeking a seat in Columbus since the big city usually scares those types of lizard people, I will be voting for the following candidates:
Michael D. Cole for Columbus School Board
Romana Reyes for Columbus School Board
Christina Vera for Columbus School Board
The other big reason vote this year is the judgeships. These aren’t partisan races, and the local machine hasn’t informed voters enough about who they’ve run for these seats in the past so there are still some Republicans holding power in a city as blue as Columbus. Personally, that makes me sick.
Mike McCallister for Municipal Court Judge.
Bill Hendrick for Municipal Court Judge.
Mark Hummer for Municipal Court Judge.
Rena Shak for Municipal Court Judge.
Cynthia L. Ebner for Municipal Court Judge.
Eileen Y. Paley for Municipal Court Judge.
Jim O’Grady for Municipal Court Judge.
Scott Kirschman for Municipal Court Judge (Environmental Division).
Mary Kay Fenlon for Municipal Court Judge
I will say I am pulling especially hard for Mr. Kirschman because he is running against longtime Republican judge Stephanie Mingo, who treated me quite unfairly last summer when I showed up to court wearing an Hawaiian shirt to fight a preposterous littering charge (later dismissed).
You might notice none of the potential judges are communist revolutionaries. But they do offer an improvement to our current predicament.
That’s called politics, baby!
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Funny you should mention Trent Smith - I wrote him in as my vote for city council this morning.
Also, don't vote for Jim O'Grady. He's a serial abuser.