It's Friday... Like That Means Anything

The days are all the same now.

Welcome to Friday! Traditionally it’s a holy day for workers as it signifies one last shift before the weekend, that sacred time that Big Business has whittled away from the American worker since the apex of labor power in the 1950s.

Every day is the same. The Rooster is the only way I’m able to keep track of time and sometimes that doesn’t help.

I haven’t spoken to anyone other than my cats since going to the grocery store last Tuesday. I no longer read my email since I’m not concerned about what some company I haven’t patronized since 2014 is doing about the coronavirus.

The big development in my life this week was the stray tiger cat that lives under my porch decided to make a new sleeping bed out of my flower pot. Instead of native Ohio gayfeather flowers, I have an ornery cat who eats like a horse and sometimes lets me pet her.

At least I live in Ohio, a state I’m still shocked led the way in the response to COVID-19; that disease of which we are all experts now thanks to reading thousands of posts from doctors on the internet. Or maybe that’s just me.

Speaking of doctors — Dr. Amy Acton, the most powerful doctor in the state and No. 2 in America only to behind Dr. Tony Fauci, released a graph yesterday that shows our slow creep to mental illness (some faster than others) is in fact saving lives:

The only part I don’t love about this graph is knowing if social distancing is successful, the worst sewer people in the world will misrepresent that data to show they were right about coronavirus being a hoax.

Oh well. I’ll gladly live with that scenario. It’s quickly become the best case. Unless President Business Deals croaks sometime between now (2:45 a.m.) and the time of publishing, he’s still working overtime to fuck up our pandemic response:

He represents his neanderthal followers so well. “Here is a scientific expert with reams of data showing you why we need a massive production of ventilators” vs. “No, sorry, I don’t believe you.”

We might be able to weather this storm if it was a story of one inept president vs. 50 competent governors. We’re not that lucky.

Here’s Alabama’s “pro-life” governor who executed an innocent man three weeks ago:

If coronavirus only killed people like President Business Deals and Governor Ivey, I could self-isolate for the next five years no problem. The knowledge of a better world being on the other end would fuel me through my solitude.

The world, however, isn’t that just. We’re not even allowed to run these bozos out of town on rails to a reservation in Idaho or wherever the fuck to unleash coronavirus on them and see how burying their heads in the sand works out for them.

America is now the No. 1 coronavirus hotspot in the world. It didn’t have to be this way, and we can thank Trump and his minions for making it so.


An army will rise today and head to work with the sole purpose of harassing poor people into paying their debts. I wonder how these people live with themselves until I realize capitalism makings profit hogs of us all.

You might think the debtors would get a relief from creditors during a global pandemic. After all, if I’m struggling to make ends meet the last person I’m going to pay is the private corporation that bought my debt for pennies on the dollar and is now trying to extort me for the full balance plus interest and “service feels.”

Debt collection is considered an essential service in Ohio, and thankfully one state legislator is trying to change that.

From Ron Regan and Mark Ackerman of

For consumers with debt ranging from auto loans, credit cards, utilities and health care, it means the business of debt collection will continue even as many consumers are facing an unsure and frightening financial future.

But late Wednesday, State Rep. Thomas West, a Democrat from Canton, introduced a bill to halt all debt collections until Ohio's state of emergency declaration ends.

The legislation would also prohibit the following practices: harassing phone calls, disconnecting electricity and other utilities, charging higher interest penalties or fees, and lawsuits to collect debts, evictions, garnishments and other efforts to collect debt.

I’m cheering for Rep. West. This is a good bill.

Unfortunately this is Ohio. I’ll be shocked if it goes anywhere. We’re talking about the same legislative body that needed an FBI corruption investigation into the former Speaker of the House for it to pass moderate payday lending reform.

Payday lending and debt collection go hand in hand, and legislative Republicans have never shown an interest in taking capital’s boot off the neck of working people.


I would have not believed you if you told me six months ago that come late March golf would be banned and/or Major League Baseball’s Opening Day would be indefinitely postponed. Had you convinced me, I would have considered today to be the greatest day of my life.

In my defense I didn’t know about the coronavirus. While I always fantasized about having not to hear about baseball for 200 days of the year or turning every golf course in America into a homeless shelter, I never envisioned having to thank a global pandemic for giving me what I wanted.

Self-isolation sucks. And I know there are millions of people in Ohio who enjoy baseball and golf, and I wish they could enjoy their hobbies during the dark times in which we find ourselves.

From Marcus Hartman of

While Ohio Gov. Mike DeWine has encouraged citizens to remain physically active despite the state being under a state-wide stay-at-home order, one popular pastime appears to be out for now. 

On Wednesday, the Clark County Combined Health District determined golf courses are non-essential businesses, meaning they must close through April 6. 

On Thursday, the Ohio Department of Health agreed. 

“The first question we ask when we are considering these decisions is, ‘Is this business essential to Clark County, Ohio, or the United States to continue operating and providing necessary resources for people?’” Emma Smales, public information officer for the CCCHD, said in an email. 

If we’re going to crack down on golf — then it’s high time we crack a whip on the rest of these business tyrants who are misclassifying their work as “essential.” I saw someone on Twitter say Staples is still open. Fuck Staples.

The faster we close them, the earlier we get a lid on corona. It’s that simple.


I’ve seen a lot of parents talking about how teachers should be paid $1 billion a year when the pandemic comes to pass. My first thought is, no shit? I’ve seen how your children act at bars, the place where middle-aged childless losers like me used to be able to go and strip away our mental faculties without toddlers running around like it’s a playground.

Maybe you’re a parent about to go bonkers because you’ve been trapped at home for two entire weeks with the child(ren) you and your partner purposefully brought into Hellworld for some reason.

Here is something the whole family can enjoy during a neighborhood walk in which you STAY SIX-FEET AWAY FROM ANYONE YOU DON’T LIVE WITH.


WEST CARROLLTON, Ohio (WDTN) – Neighborhoods across Ohio are helping kids beat the pandemic blues by getting outside.

Parents are working together to set up “teddy bear hunts.” Neighbors put teddy bears or pictures of teddy bears in their windows, and when kids go out for a walk, they’re challenged to see how many they can find.

“We’ve had extra screen time right now with no school, so things like this get them excited to get out of the house and we can wave at our neighbors across the street,” said West Carrollton resident Jennifer Ray.

The idea came from a group on Facebook. They recommend using social media to come up with fun and safe activities during the next few weeks.

Thank God for the internet to pass good ideas like this around. I’m not sure America could survive a lockdown without it.

THOSE WMDs. Fox Sports dipshit Clay Travis is spreading the worst coronavirus misinformation… GoFundMe confronts coronavirus demand… We’re not going back to normal… Once a relic, then a hipster fad, milkmen embrace the flood of clients… What the Democratic party could learn from freshman Congresswoman Katie Porter.