I'm a Phone Farmer Now

My therapist recently violated doctor-patient privilege by interrogating me in a way I couldn’t repatriate for a viral Twitter joke to parry earnest examination of my life decisions. Sure, finding a part-time day hustle might benefit my mental health in that licking factory floors clean with my tongue would be more healthful than staring 10 hours a day at my phone reading all the bad things happening in the world 12 seconds after they happen via a

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